beloved kai.
as He is, so am I in this world.
smoooooo accountancy!!
minister of the New Covenant

i am so tired... more updates once the week draws to a close...

beloved kai is in Christ at
 11:48 PM

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You are my strength O God,
You are my help O God.
You are the One on whom I call.

You are my shield O God,
My life I yield O God.
For You will ever be my All in All.

beloved kai is in Christ at
 10:26 AM

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sister lynette (heh.) just shared with me fresh manna from 2 Cor 12:9-10

"And He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness." Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distress, for Christ's sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

how true, how true. let the weak say i am strong. I AM STRONG! because my Daddy says so! who's my Daddy you ask? Almighty God. wanna challenge Him?

beloved kai is in Christ at
 2:11 AM

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when you FEAR, you have forgotten how much GOD LOVES YOU.

i happened to open my hp's msg inbox and chanced on one of sister LYNETTE's (hahaha!) edifying messages. didn't really take notice of it when i received it 4 days back but now, on hindsight, it is only further testimony that God already had His words of comfort for me even before the problem confronted me.

"You will not need to fight in this battle. Position yourselves, stand still and see the salvation of the LORD, who is with you, O Judah and Jerusalem! Do not fear or be dismayed; tomorrow go out against them, for the LORD is with you." -2 Chr 20:17

i think it's beautiful. i just have to stand still and see the victory purchased by Jesus for me! i shall not fear or be dismayed. tomorrow when i return to camp and face them, i shall do so knowing my beloved Daddy in Heaven IS WITH ME.

beloved kai is in Christ at
 1:52 AM

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cg today was awesome. i really love all of you guys (and girls).

what really struck me today was what one of my beloved sisters, aiw*i, shared. when i mentioned that my TP was on the 13th, she told me that 13 is the number of turn around! that's somewhere in the book of Esther. shall go read up on it in a moment's time. anyway, that's really, really so encouraging, after having flunked TP twice. hahahahaha... this is going to be my turnaround in circumstance! thank You Daddy... Your unmerited and unearned favour surrounds me LIKE A SHIELD. Your grace sees me through :D and thanks sister! :)

beloved kai is in Christ at
 12:07 AM

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went back to college today and had lunch with my civics tutor. found my econs tutor, fm (analysis) tutor, mr ho, mr seet, mr kho and who would guess? ks too. it was great but could've been better had i caught mr seet at the right time - he was leaving for parkway to buy something. oh well, better timing next time. couldn't find GP tutor or physics tutor, with the former on leave and the latter.. well? dunno. hahahaha.

i've heard so many things regarding my work lately, mostly centred around me not staying in and begrudging attitudes against me. let go and let God defend me. by my own self effort to defend myself, it's never going to work. but by His grace and undeserved, unmerited favour, all things work out for good in Christ. anyway there's going to be another officer coming in to take command of my platoon, and there's already speculation that it's because of my poor performance. hahahaha. the least shall be the greatest! :) to my fellow officer(s) who have talked to me about this, thanks for the concern and willingness to listen to both sides of the story. i'm really secure in my Jesus, i just can't be bothered what happens or what people say. you're right, i have my reasons for doing what i do. thanks brothers. :)

today's sermon was powerful and timely about the favour of God in my life.

looking back on the things that have happened recently in the wake of the end of the carnival, it's amazing what security and insecurity in God can do.

beloved kai is in Christ at
 1:06 AM

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it's official. i'm addicted to FT's mango with nata de coco in addition to my PF fuji apple aloe vera.

my sis just told me she's gonna give me her ancient 20 GB ipod.. haha.. nowhere near the mini i want but it'll do (for now)! been playing the piano virtually the whole of the afternoon, trying to play some worship songs smoothly.. until i realised i don't know how to read the score for 'still'! it's super complicated can? anyway i tried playing 'Jesus my Lord my life' and it's pretty ok.. at least the score is readable (if there's such a word.. if not pardon my English - the army has done a fine job of ruining it).

let's see... today's topic of the day is... dental care. hahahahaha.

i (not so) recently bought a new toothbrush to replace the one that served me for a good one year faithfully. the old one was fine, but i somehow recall how someone said that toothbrushes should be changed every so often (i don't know, once every half a year?). so anyway, i complied with those words of wisdom ringing in my ears. then, more recently, i realised that the new toothbrush (with its new and improved and apparently more superior design) was not cleaning the mini gaps between my teeth! that's something i never encountered with the old toothbrush! so, horrors of all horrors, i noticed plague in between! after much procrastination, i'm now the proud owner of... DENTAL FLOSS. i never thought i'd see the day i would use it, but looking at things so far, it must have been a gimmick by the very same company producing the toothbrush to design it such a way that dental floss becomes a complementary product! how could they! it's a ploy! a conspiracy! bah.

PS. toothbrushes and dental floss are indeed complementary. any dentist would tell you that! i'm kidding in the above entry and if you can't see the satirical nature of it, then go out, see a dentist and get a life. don't sue me, oh you big toothbrush firms.

beloved kai is in Christ at
 5:40 PM

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buddy Informal n.

1. A good friend; a comrade.
2. A partner, especially one of a pair or team associated under the buddy system

hey matt are you reading this? hahaha... got me thinking about what a buddy actually is. two distinct variations: the military interpretation and the general interpretation, and no i don't mean general as in those stars you find on epaulettes and shoulder boards.


Semper Fidelis (Latin) - Always Faithful

the motto of the USMC. got me thinking. always faithful to God, to our family, to our loved ones. that's how a website put it across in relation to this maxim. what do we fight for? in time of war, who and what do we fight for? family, loved ones and the very land that i chose to defend are some things that come to mind. the former two, hopefully, are far from the battlefield. the latter is immaterial - in the heat of battle, who remembers such boundaries? but i do know and constantly will fight for are the men around me. the men who have, together with me, either by choice or conscription, sworn to protect this country, even with their lives. on the everchanging and evolving battlefield where lives are extremely fragile, it is the men next to me whom i fight for. and as such, the enforcement of the buddy system. i believe it originated from a need to watch out for one another as part of the regimental system, but once war ensues, your buddy, more often than not, is the reason to fight on, to soldier on. NSF or regular, it matters not. your buddy does.

The General Translation

ok, i'm usually not so philosophical in my rantings and ravings. hahahaha. so let's move on to the more subtle and peaceful side of this post. this is a personal opinion more than anything else. anyway, here goes. my interpretation of the word buddy in the non-military context.

a buddy is someone whom...
i trust with the stuff i can't tell other friends.
i can confide in easily.
i know is there for me.
shares and shares alike. (emotionally, spiritually and to some extent, physically as in food!)
is always willing to help.
knows who i am and what i am. (no, really.)
i think i lost.
i am still looking for.

now now, i have my Jesus and my dearie, so don't go around saying i'm insecure or something like that. sure, both of them satisfy the above criteria, but they are in a different relationship from that of a buddy. now the closest was someone who lives near me, but even he has somehow faded into the horizon.

beloved kai is in Christ at
 5:38 PM

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strange twist of events, but perhaps one i saw coming. things straighten out, decisions are made, lives are changed and above all, God is in charge, God is in control.

happy 20th, lieutenant, and watch the whipped cream. don't say i didn't warn you.. bring a fresh change of clothes ok? Jesus really loves you and loves to have some fun.. and so do we!!! hahahahaha.

beloved kai is in Christ at
 1:07 AM

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"This is the day the Lord has made; we will rejoice and be glad in it." -Psalm 118:24

how true.. a beautiful and glorious day! handed over duty with such efficiency and swiftness that i've never encountered before - largely due to the need to only hand over 2 armouries instead of the usual 5 plus the stupid garage that is about 2000m (ok, that's an exaggeration) away. it's such a glaring error in the design of the camp! i wonder which moron...

so anyway i met h*rry at west m*ll for breakfast at (where else?) Mc's. there we talked about the usual stuff - army, army and more army. the occasional bit of reminiscence about school days, and of course, more army. really interesting to chat with him. something enigmatic probably, and definitely in a positive way.

met dearie, went to find her textbooks, only to find out that the bookstore in question had temporarily relocated. a subsequent visit to another major bookstore nearby her house was also futile.

i'm hungry. and feeling fat after devouring 90% of that curry chicken rice. i should go run soon.

beloved kai is in Christ at
 8:20 PM

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on duty today. this is the 4th sunday i've missed service either due to duty or the stupid carnival... and i really dislike missing service even though i know i haven't been shortchanged! sigh. felt so dry lately until i attended campus yesterday and bs the day before... truly, the word of God is life... it's brimming and overflowing so exceedingly and abundantly with life!

i turned out the guards. heh. at least i'm not as bad as others - they do it at 2am or even twice!! hahaha.. i've since repented.. (maybe?) sometimes it really depends on mood lah. if i were pissed i'd probably do it every hour or something to that effect. hahahahaha.. and the best part? it's still part of my job!

as the song goes...

When I fall down
You pick me up
When I am dry
You fill my cup
You are my all in all...

beloved kai is in Christ at
 11:19 PM

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i'm going to sleep after this post. oink.

a lazy day today. watched debb*e trav*s "home improvement" show with dearie. it's fantastic, the face lifts they give to the rooms in houses. i can certainly identify with some of the ubercool designs and totally outrageous ones! hah. my house next time shall be funkily decorated.

bs was fantastic with pastor a*ge taking the pulpit. his norwegian accent was kind of strong though, and for a while i couldn't figure out that he was pronouncing the word 'norwegian' the way he was pronouncing it! but it was really powerful to hear the same gospel from another man of God. oh, and the dynamics of today's group attending bs was really hilarious. hahaha.

took a bus with yas and delivered a prata supper to dearie. it's been a while since i did something like that (the latter portion -_-) and i'm glad i did. it was wonderful. :)

beloved kai is in Christ at
 2:04 AM

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just finished ''The Testament" by john grish*m. really enjoy his books... hahahaha.. i find all this litigation and legal stuff interesting.

these 3 days after the carnival have been spent in the recovery phase i.e. helping to tear down the giant showground we have set up and returning the nuts and bolts to their original location @ ALB.

haven't kept abreast of news developments lately, particularly during the ndp period. all i remember is the presidential walkover and lots of soddy stuff from a candidate-hopeful's past smearing his credentials and reputation. well, just like the book i just completed, it's like the discovery phase in the litigation involving the inheritance of an eleven-billion fortune. everything comes out and it's never pleasant, plus it's subjected to so much public scrutiny. now, in the case of the presidency, i would think the same too. i wouldn't want a relative unknown to contest for presidency without knowing all the mud that covers his/her name. the lack of a worthy contestant, however, highlights several things: are worthy candidates shunning away from such an opportunity to serve the nation? if so, why? or are we really so incapable that we can't produce people of presidential calibre? maybe the govt should set up some form of scholarship to nurture young minds into future presidential candidates (and call it the PRESIDENT'S SCHOLARSH*P, hahahahaha).

well anyway, just my 2 cents worth (really, i think it's not even worth 2 cents.) on this issue.

beloved kai is in Christ at
 7:48 PM

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1 more day to the end of the carnival! I shall attempt to type in proper English for once. Heh.

It has truly been an amazing 8 days so far at the carnival. Daddy God has responded so faithfully to my requests for the weather to be merciful. Tiring it may have been, but it has been really a blessed time at the carnival! There was much interaction and I can safely say, there were more plus points than negative ones and blessed interaction with the crowd rather than nasty confrontations. In addition, I've managed to attend BS and CG after my duties at the carnival! Praise Jesus! My Daddy is always faithful and whatever time I invest in God's word, it shall be multiplied sevenfold unto me! My thirty, sixty and hundredfold! Woohoo! What's more, I've also managed to fellowship with the guys during jamming today! Truly, God is faithful :)

Tomorrow's the closing ceremony for the carnival a.k.a. THE FREAKING LAST DAY. Just imagine the joy flowing through me now :D It's a fantastic feeling!

beloved kai is in Christ at
 12:43 AM

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4 more days to the end of this carnival affair!!!

UnUsUaL is really unusual. they set aside a VIP seating area and guess what? there are NO ushers from them to bring VIP pass holders in! and i had to take over their stupid job! why not pay me instead of these really inefficient and total BS people.. all they do is stand one corner and relax and be RUDE to us! we're humans too you know.. not trash or dirt!

indeed, the thematic phrase for this carnival 'Dynamic People' is true. everything's so dynamic.. in the wrong way! hahahahahaha...

anyway today's show ended pretty early today... the tempo reached a climax yesterday and is beginning to tone down... special, special day today! watched e chocolate fac today with dearie.. e musical tone of e show was just so great! i love musicals!

beloved kai is in Christ at
 11:54 PM

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our special day!!! wheeeee!!!

beloved kai is in Christ at
 6:23 AM

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happy (belated) NATIONAL DAY! woohoo! hahahahaha... the countdown party @ marina was no doubt a blast culminating in the most captivating fireworks display i've ever seen... anyway it was back to camp at shortly after it was time to move out again back to marina for more...

i despise the 610 free comms.. it is so weak! bleah. today i got scolded non stop by a bunch of protesting civilians. they wanted to enter the showground but i refused to let them to due to the great influx of people... all who wanted to catch the spectacular fireworks display. so this man was right in front leading a pack of people trying mightily to convince me to let them in but i stood my ground and had to explain things to him patiently... oh just give me a rifle and i'll shoot his brains out! Lord...

more to come tmr. -_-

beloved kai is in Christ at
 12:10 AM

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day 2. the sun was blazing like it never did before (which is partially true since the weather has been terrible during rehearsals). so here's the revenge of the sun. -_-

so tired. tomorrow's going to be better cos my Daddy says so! His mercies are new every morning! Daddy Your grace, favour and mercies are new every morning for Your beloved son...ME!!! wheeeeee!

i miss going to church. already missed 2 svcs. :

2 days to NDP! countdown party tomorrow with a concert and PM gracing the occasion!

beloved kai is in Christ at
 11:52 PM

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day 1 of carnival.

it was a catastrophic disaster by some standards but nonetheless blessed and watched over by my Daddy!!! really a great experience ushering the massive crowds into their stands and live experimentation on how to handle situations. never mind the scoldings, condemnation and mumblings of the really nonsense ones, i pray that my Daddy blesses them still cos he/she who curses me shall be cursed by my Daddy... but i shall have mercy on them... hahahahahaha...

tired. 2nd nite w/o sleeping properly. hopefully no more to come. Daddy..

beloved kai is in Christ at
 12:48 AM

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didn't sleep well last nite.

tmr's the opening ceremony for the carnival by e pres... quite elaborate.. ok lah.. what with handheld illums and electric confetti to make it look grand.. hahahahahaha..

FOP today was GREAT. in fact, no words can adequately express how much i love singing to my Daddy! edmund bro you're completely healed!!! communion is your medicine :D hahahahaha...

sleep.

beloved kai is in Christ at
 1:01 AM

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over the parking position of the car.
over office politics.

what's wrong with this world engulfed in darkness?

I BIND YOU IN JESUS' MIGHTY NAME YOU DEVIL!

beloved kai is in Christ at
 11:02 PM

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there're 2 things i want to do now: sing to Daddy all night long and go outfield. the first option is a great way to refresh Daddy's love upon me. the second promises that at least i don't have to remember all these; a great respite but a miserable escape.

beloved kai is in Christ at
 9:31 PM

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